Okay. So. I've been quiet for a while now huh? There are good reasons, believe me, there are. Finding a place to start listing them is difficult, even for wordy me.

Taking a few deep breathes before I dive head first into this.

We'll start from where I left off. My life feeling like it was falling apart.

We were in serious financial trouble. Our lease is up on our house July 6th. We aren't approved for a loan yet. We don't have a house in mind. We're lost. We have barely a month to pack. It's happened before, I know we can make it out of that. Moving within a month isn't impossible, just very difficult.

Now the financial situation is what worried me.... My parents business was in serious trouble. We were in a lot of debt during my last entry. The kind that makes people lose their business. We had a sale at the store and business has picked up. God's hands are all over my life, let me tell you... We're doing well enough to get by, but we still need to have business pick up more.

My dad's cousin died, I never met her and dad hadn't seen her since he was a bit older than me. There wasn't a deep emotional bond there, but losing another family member, no matter how removed, is a jolting thought.



On the 22nd we put our little female cat to sleep. Jack was very sick, and she had been sick like this before. It was obvious it'd be a painful and recurring condition. The most humane thing we could do was have her put down. I miss my little Jacqueline. We called her lots of things, Lil Bit, Jack O Lantern, Jack-alack, Jacqueline, Jumping Jack Flash, Fuzzy Butt... She had an adorable manner and the sweetest little smile constantly on her face. I wish we could have given her a better life. So... Here I will formally say goodbye. I love you Jack-alack... I miss you baby girl. You were such a little darling. I'll miss your little voice in the morning when I'd walk into the hall, and the cute way you would flip over for me to rub your belly. That adorable pink nose, outlined in black. You were a darling. I'll never ever forget you baby.

My uncle Richard and my grandma Judy came up here the 25th and spent the night. They came up for the birthday party we have every year for my uncle and aunt Carol. Their birthday's are close together. I hadn't seen my grandma Judy in three years, so it was really nice to see her.

On the 26th Will flew in so he'd be here for the party on the 27th. It was very important to me that he meet my grandma and uncle and he understood that. He and his father worked out the details for him to be here for that.

We had a wonderful week, we spent days laying around watching movies, I dragged him to the MOA and we went to the movies to see the new Pirates of the Caribbean movie. Yesterday we went to the Minnesota Zoo where he very patiently mused my complete adoration of prairie dogs lol I think we spent twenty minutes watching them lol

I had so much fun this past week. It made everything seem better. He took my mind off of everything that's going on. He constantly made me laugh so hard my head started to spin and my stomach would ache.

He and I looked at some real estate, trying to get an idea of what we're up against when it comes to finding a place here together. I think we can handle it.

This whole week confirmed my complete devotion to our relationship. I realized just how happy he makes me, how much he supports me and nurtures me. He is such a blessing to me.

We snuck around so we could sleep in the same bed. (Parents not happy with that idea even though they know we slept in the same bed the whole time I was in NY with him in October.) I love how it feels to lay there wrapped up in his arms and feel him slowly dose off around me.... even when he snores lol It's great to wake up first thing in the morning and give him a kiss, morning breath or not, I don't care, I like it lol



I felt like this trip completely cemented our relationship. Sometimes you feel that change come and go and you don't ever feel it when it happened. That's how this feels. I know we turned a corner, but I don't remember it happening.

Maybe he thinks what I'm thinking, maybe he doesn't. But I've got this deep yearning feeling for something so much more than this.

I'm definitely ready to live together. I'm so ready for it to happen. I want my other half with me. I know myself when I'm with him. I don't feel insecure or anything. I feel completely at ease. He's healthy for me. This is good for me.

He left at about 1:30 this afternoon. It's 5:15 in the evening.

I miss him so much. I can't wait to see him again.

I love you baby. Thank you for coming, for meeting my family, for knowing how important this was for me...You gave me everything I so desperately needed right now. You were my relief. I can't wait to have you back home. No one else will get this but you, baby; Thank you for my home.