It's nearing 2am. Wow. Suddenly feel like singing that song lol... Anyway. My eyes are tired, my back aches and my fingers ache. But the good news is something came out of being up that late, and out of the strange concoction of emotions I've been enduring the last few weeks. A painting. I stayed up painting. It's not quite done, but it almost is. Any true artist knows when to stop right? Well, I'm just about there. But the rest of the paint has to dry before I can add the finishing touches.

It's definitely abstract. An eye. Red and yellow, lined with green. The lashes are a mixture of colors. Red, lime, teal, blue, purple, yellow. And of course the mix of colors that come from where the brushstrokes mingle. For once I didn't think about how it "looked" but how I felt. I did something purely from my heart, no intention, no plan, no drawings. Just what I felt. I have to admit I'm excited to get it finished and get a picture on here. I really feel proud of it. Not because it's a "great work of art" but because it's me. Because it's the window into my soul. My eye. My emotion. My heart. Not planned, not the way a painting "should" be, not neat and organized. Messy, colorful, free.

It wasn't until I sat down to write this that I realize why I started to paint an eye. Why that first brushstroke told me what it would be. I've always believed eyes are the windows to our souls. Especially mine. I know how easy it is for others to see my emotions in my eyes. I can be smiling and happy but my eyes say something else entirely. I know you can see me in my eyes. That's also why I chose green to line the inside of the eye. A quiet jealousy. I'm actually finding it very comforting to dissect my painting. Maybe I'll figure it all out soon.

But for now, I must sleep... and wash tha paint of my hands lol